“I know all the things you do. I have seen your love, your faith, your service, and your patient endurance. And I can see your constant improvement in all these things. But I have this complaint against you. You are permitting that woman—that Jezebel who calls herself a prophet to lead my servants astray…” Revelation 2:19-20 (NLT)
When in conflict with another, we can choose to focus on the character of the person or the conduct of the person. If we focus on the character, it tears him/her down. It makes him/her feel bad about himself/herself. It could undermine the way they see themselves, and it could be things they cannot or should not change.
Instead, we can focus on the conduct of the person. We can focus on the actions that the person did. We can explain how the actions were hurtful and help him/her understand how he/she may be able to change them in the future.
Prayer: God, thank you for the reminder to focus on conduct and not character. Help me to remember that you are working on us all and that none of us are perfect. Remind me to build people up and not tear them down. In Jesus name. Amen.